“Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities.”
~Voltaire
On March 15 the Calgary Flames played the Edmonton Oilers in an NHL game.
In that game there was a sequence of events that demonstrate why violence exists in hockey and illustrate the larger problem with ways of thinking that exist within a frame of honour and shame.
In hockey, a degree of violence is allowed and even celebrated. Players are allowed to body-check other players, and a mantra of coaching in many levels of hockey (even kids’ hockey) is “finish your check”. This refers to completing a body-check that you have started. The idea is to not hold back. Finishing the check is seen as something that will wear down the opponent or at least intimidate them. While body-checks are allowed, hitting someone in the head is not. In the game on March 15, a player for the Edmonton Oilers in a body-check of a player on the Calgary Flames made contact with his opponents’ head. This kind of action, intentional or not, often draws immediate retribution from the team of the player who was hit. It also means that the player who did the hitting will likely have to fight an opponent later in the game. This is called “the code” in hockey. The more complete name for this is “the honour code” and it has existed beyond hockey in many parts of society and culture throughout history.
The honour code states that violence is acceptable in the name of protecting honour and avoiding shame.
In the case of the hockey game, there was a fight later in the game, and the player who had previously hit an opponent in the head obliged and agreed to fight. The officials stood by and let the fight happen (again, according to the code) until the Edmonton Oilers player was knocked unconscious to the ice. This was, in the description of some commentators and of the coach of the Calgary Flames, honourable behaviour. (Side note: all of this took place in a sport that says, apparently without sarcasm, that they are trying to get rid of “head shots” in their games.)
It turns out that in society at large a key indicator of a culture becoming much less violent is the dropping of the honour/shame code. NHL hockey is a dinosaur in this regard. It holds onto the code.
“As long as war is regarded as wicked, it will always have its fascination. When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular.”
~Oscar Wilde
The honour code has done terrible damage (and continues to do so) in many religious cultures. This can find expression in the extreme of young women being killed for “shaming” the family or father. Less extreme, but still troubling, is when parents within a church culture act according to fear or worry about how their child or children may “dishonour” the family by breaking some religious rule or standard. Many parents in churches have known what it means to feel anxiety about how others might view them in light of the behaviour or belief of their children. An encouragement to parents who might still feel these things; go ahead and drop that code, be free from it.
There is actually a considerable amount of violence within some understandings of Christian faith. The idea of an eternal hell of physical torment is about as violent as things can get. Part of Christian history is the reality that people (as individuals or as groups) could be killed simply for believing the wrong things or for dishonouring the leaders. Hopeful Christian theology is unafraid to look at some of the destructive and violent tendencies within systems of Christian belief and practice. The honour and shame code is not hopeful.
Hockey will be better without the honour code. Christianity will be better without the honour code. We’re not there yet. We still have some primitive ideas about why Jesus died, about how God views us, and about how we are to view others.
There is a word that might help. Instead of honour and shame, think of dignity. Each person has dignity in their humanity. This does not mean that we always act in a dignified manner - far from it - but it becomes harder to punch someone in the head repeatedly (or treat them harshly to protect our own reputation) when we realize that they have dignity and worth.
For an in-depth look at the concept of the honour/shame code and how its abandonment leads to declining violence in society see Steven Pinker’s book,
”The Better Angels of Our Nature: Why Violence has Declined”