Marie Kondo comes across as a very nice person. My wife and I watched some of the Netflix series Tidying Up With Marie Kondo a few years ago and, for a while, we took some of the tips to heart. You may recall the decluttering tips, the most familiar of which was to get rid of things that don’t “spark joy”.
Kondo has a new book out that is less about tidying up and more about achieving your ideal life. In a recent interview she mentioned that she herself has been unable (or unwilling) to keep things tidy like she used to. As she puts it: “My home is messy, but the way I am spending my time is the right way for me at this time at this stage of my life.”
She has young children now and has decided that she wants to give less time to tidying.
This will make many people in the world breathe a little easier.
Marie Kondo’s house is messy. Hold on to that little gem the next time you are judging yourself for not having the energy to clean things up. It can feel like the giving of permission.
There is something bigger to consider from this small example. Autonomy is important and it does not have to mean a failure to consider the larger human interest beyond ourselves. You might be helped by some of the tidying tips that Kondo shared, but they ought not become oppressive.
In the spiritual life, there are people who purposefully or inadvertently determine what kind of life you should be leading. You may have experienced this. An authority figure or figure in a church setting decides what is acceptable or not for you, for your life. You then, if you trust them or are forced to accept their judgment, order your sense of self around their directions, prescriptions, and condemnations. It can be a life-giving freedom to step out of this.
I don’t think that Marie Kondo demanded that we live life according to her tidying up progamme. However, knowing that she herself is aware that there are more important things than a clean house is encouraging. There are times when tidying up simply does not spark joy.
Truly thoughtful religious and spiritual leaders know the same thing. Whatever plan or progamme they have, it is never to be taken as the most important thing at all times, at all costs. Be wary of the people who say “God is at work” and then point to their particular programme as the work that God is doing. When God is really at work you don’t have to convince people.
Religious leaders who have confidence in what they are saying do not demand that you always follow what they say, no matter what. Leadership like that is self-focused, not other focused. It is focused on the leader, not on real faith or love.
Tidying up can be great, but not tidying up can be great, too.